I used to scoff at the fact that maternity leave was treated as short-term disability. I mean, you’re getting the six weeks to feed, bond with, and otherwise take care of the baby, not because it’s a medical condition, right?
After having been through the birth, however, I think that kind of “pelvic floor trauma” definitely counts as a major medical procedure and weeks of recovery are indeed warranted.
Today we celebrate Henry’s due date! Of course, he arrived two weeks early.
I know I said that he might come early, but honestly, I was not mentally prepared for his early arrival. When my water broke, I was aware that the doctor would want to have the baby delivered within about 12 hours. So as soon as we’d figured out that my water broke, I knew that we would be having the baby by Sunday. It was disturbing to me to know that there was a definite end time to the pregnancy, it was rapidly approaching, and I had no control over any of it.
Ele talks about wishing she had savored the experience of the delivery more. I really felt like I understood what she meant, and had every intention of making a conscious effort to inventory, document and appreciate the birth experience. However, the whole experience went so quickly! I dilated so much quicker than any of us anticipated. It was also much more painful than I’d anticipated, even though I had an epidural. To add to that, the strain of physically pushing the baby out combined with the loathsome pain of reflux that occurred every minute I was pushing nearly put me out of my mind. In the middle of the height of pushing, my only thought was “get this baby out of me NOW and I don’t care what it takes.” So much for savoring the experience.
I went into labor on Saturday, and on Sunday Cristin and I had scheduled a photo shoot to do belly pictures. Once labor started, I was so disappointed when I realized we weren’t going to get to do the photo shoot. On Sunday, I still had a pretty big belly and for a moment, I considered whether we could fake it. I realized that anything else I wanted to do while pregnant was no longer an option. The last pictures we took of me pregnant are just that, the last pictures we took when I was pregnant. I am kind of reeling from the whole loss of pregnancy.
Now that Henry is two weeks old (golly!!), I am still trying to adjust to the fact that I’m not pregnant any more. It took a lot of time to get adjusted to the idea of being pregnant, and it turns out that it’s really nice to be pregnant (assuming you’re not having a difficult pregnancy). Being pregnant is like carrying around a secret. A little secret you share with this unborn person. A little secret that only you and the little person know about. You talk to the little person pretty constantly. He’s is your constant companion. He might annoy you occasionally but won’t wake you in the middle of the night. Once he’s born, your secret is out and he is suddenly so much less manageable.
There is a tangible loss with even the happiest of births.
As a side note, I’m going to take down my Pregnancy page, but you can still get to it from here.
I’ve been consumed with learning how to breastfeed for the past two weeks. Breastfeeding isn’t easy – it’s not natural or automatic like you might think. Also, the baby isn’t born knowing how to suckle. It’s understandable that people give up after only a few days – it is a really frustrating when it doesn’t go right.
I suggest if you are trying to breastfeed, don’t give up! Ask for help. Get a lactation consultant. Ask for more help. Talk to your friends about their experiences. And realize that it’s totally normal to struggle with it. It’s taken about two weeks for me to get the hang of it.
I’m happy to report that as of yesterday afternoon, Henry’s bilirubin score was 12.7, which is great! He’s off the billy blanket and simply needs to go back in for final check tomorrow to make sure that the level hasn’t rebounded.
He’s feeding more vigorously, and he’s waking us up to be fed. He’s even staying awake a bit after feeding, opening his eyes and checking out his surroundings.
So hooray! We’ve got ourselves a little baby who’s going to give us many sleepless nights just like last night. 🙂
Wow, our first week with the baby has passed – Henry is already a week old!
Dave’s parents left on Sunday and he started back to work today, so it’s just me and the little man hanging out on the couch right now.
That means if you’ve been wanting to come visit, the time is at hand! If you want to have girl time and sit around with the baby, I’d recommend dropping by during the day if at all possible. If you want to visit with both Dave and I then you can visit in the evening. Regardless of which is better for you, just call or email me to make sure I’m up and around.
Also, if you drop by, we’d love it if you’d bring some food. Food preparation isn’t high on my list of priorities but I’m the primary cook in the house, so right now any contributions you could make would be really appreciated!
Can’t wait to see you soon!
Henry just did his first “pee straight up in the air” trick while getting changed! Time for the pee pee teepees!
It is 1:34 AM on Saturday morning, marking the 6 day anniversary of Henry‘s entrance into the world. It’s high time you had an update.
Henry was diagnosed with jaundice while he was still in the hospital. Six out of ten babies suffer from jaundice, so it’s quite a common condition. Also, Henry was a vacuum extraction baby which caused significant bruising to the top of his head – this can increase the chances of getting jaundice. So we weren’t too surprised when he was diagnosed.
The treatment for jaundice is to use a colored light called phototherapy. This helps break down the extra material which is building up in the body that the liver can’t process. In order for this treatment to work, however, the baby has to eat and poop – only through pooping can he rid his body of the extraneous cells which cause the jaundice.
However, a side effect of jaundice is a sleepy, sluggish baby. So you are presented with a Catch-22. The jaundiced baby needs to eat (and poop) frequently, but the jaundiced baby is so sleepy that it’s hard to interest them in eating.
Add to that scenario a lack of experience with breastfeeding on both the mother and baby’s part, and you have a situation where it can be difficult and frustrating to feed the baby with no obvious solution to the jaundice.
That’s where we were a day ago. Henry learned how to nurse on Tuesday, thanks to Joan, an amazing nurse who spent hours with us teaching both me and the baby how to achieve a good latch. However, it was difficult to practice because he would fall asleep after only 5 minutes of nursing. On Wednesday we met with the lactation consultant, Spring, who explained the effects that the jaundice was having on our nursing. It was great to have this explained to us – kept me from taking it personally. She recommended buying a pump and attempting to bottle feed the baby. This would help me feel better physically (it did!), and it meant that Henry would get a steady supply of food, making him poop and relieving the jaundice.
Once we came home on Wednesday, we spent Wednesday night waking the baby every 2-3 hours to feed him expressed milk by bottle. He would fall right back asleep after feedings but at least he was getting food, which helped make me feel better. His doctor’s appointment on Thursday found his jaundice levels still high, so the doctor prescribed a “billy blanket” for the phototherapy and requested we keep his digestive system moving. Thursday night we went back to nursing, rather than bottle feeding, as I was beginning to be quite panicked about the effects of “nipple confusion.” He was not eating as much with breastfeeding as he was with bottle feeding, however, so he was not gaining weight and wasn’t pooping enough. We went back to the doctor on Friday. Henry’s jaundice levels were improving, though not in the clear. The doctor encouraged us to supplement nursing with bottle feeding expressed milk. Friday night (tonight) we combined both breastfeeding and bottle feeding and I think the little guy may have just turned a corner, thanks to the blanket and the consistent feeding!
As of 3 AM, he was actually fussy! This is a remarkable change from the endless sleeping he’s done since we met him. He appears to be waking himself about every two hours, presumably to eat. When he eats, he suckles for at least 10 minutes at a stretch, and in the past 12 hours has nursed for as long as 30 minutes at a stretch. He’s having his 6-8 wet diapers every day and his poops are starting to get that mustard yellow color.
We have an appointment on Sunday to get his jaundice levels checked. I am feeling hopeful that he’ll show marked improvement and we can take him off his billy blanket soon. I also think we’re getting the hang of breastfeeding and we can stop supplementing.
Yay!!
After months of patiently and impatiently waiting, our crib arrived! Dave and his dad put it together last night.
It is gorgeous and fits perfectly in the room.
Dave made the bed, with the skirt and bumpers. Perfect!
And here’s Henry’s new stuffed lion, courtesy of Granma Sue.
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